"...And the merciful Lord Captain sayeth, 'Nay, not Adam and Eve, but rather, Adam and Steve. For what other duo of hardcore pipe-hitting buddies gettin that good powder together could ever be appropriate for such an expression of companionship?' For His is the Ship, the Rudder, and the Stern, Now and Forever."

A captain without a powder monkey is like a dog without a bone, a flower without the sun,
a porn star without a giant cock, a korean popstar without plastic surgery,

for a Captain without a Powder Monkey is hardly any Captain at all,
but just ball of mass with no direction, incentive or purpose--hardly human at all.

I cannot miss you, for missing would be a human trait,
something this miserable heap of flesh cannot comprehend,
for without my Powder Monkey I am nothing more than nothing.